RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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