Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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