One girl and one boy is just not enough.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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