adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
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