Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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