If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Welp...herpes.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
