No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
