I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
