dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
