last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
