i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
is it fun? or sober?
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