Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
where am i from again
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
