Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize