At least make sure they are 18
Why
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize
