so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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