I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize