Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
