No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
That accounts for only three of the penises
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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