Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
