I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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