if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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