Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
