He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
What a dumb baby whore.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
