You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
We have started to decorate penises.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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