In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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