Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Dignity is for republicans.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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