woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
