who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
There's always time for handjobs
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Randomize
