mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
