Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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