happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
