He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
you will always have a special place in my vag
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
