tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
