OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
