Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
