Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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