420 ftw
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Be still, my beating vagina.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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