Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize