Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
