Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
