I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
