I'm really into asian looking animals
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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