As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
