And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I intend to get homeless drunk
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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