I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
