New invention idea: vibrating tampons
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
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