He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize