I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
