how hairy? two words: wookie tits
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
