some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
