Grow some girl-balls and come out already
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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